day 2 - Ready!

Am I ready to embark on this health quest? The answer of course is yes, but I have to question my conviction. It is easy to say yes to something so obvious, but like I said yesterday, it is the “doing” that counts. My husband and I have a dinner party to go to this evening. And we still have holiday food and goodies lying around. What to do?

It is interesting the number of people that go to a doctor for an ailment and hope that he will give them a prescription to make them better. And of course if the doctor has diagnosed and prescribed, we take that as gospel and go home and dutifully take our little bottle of pills. But what happens when the doctor says, “you have to lose weight?” He hasn’t written it on his little white prescription pad. We don’t have to go to the pharmacy to fill our “weight loss prescription”.

I imagine many of us don’t get serious about how our weight effects our health until we are diagnosed with some underlying disease, such as diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, etc. Even then, we still have a hard time adjusting our diets to fit the prescription for health. In fact, most people start a diet to fit into their favorite pair of jeans, attend their high school reunion, or because someone told them they looked fat (maybe in a nice way or not so nice way!) But these are all outside influences that don’t really have anything to do with health, so it is easy to abandon ship when things get hard.

I have been diagnosed with high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and other smaller ailments (hip and knee pain) that would benefit from a healthy diet and weight loss. But after a brief lip service to “I have to lose weight”, I go back to my regular habits and the health issues remain. See the doctor hasn’t scared me enough. He gave me a pill for the high blood pressure, and was ready to prescribe something for the high cholesterol. I hated the thought of taking pills for the rest of my life, so I begged him to give me a chance to correct it on my own. I haven’t gone back to the doctor in over a year, because I know what he will say.

So today’s goal, action, event, is to probe what motivates me to lose weight. Is it so I can look better in my clothes, feel like I measure up to my friends who aren’t overweight? Heck yeah! I am a woman, and while I have let myself go, there is a primal part of me that desires to look good to my peers and myself.

But having been overweight for several years now, I know that is not enough to motivate me. It is not enough to get me through the hard days when I am craving something sweet, not enough to put the brakes on a food frenzy in motion. If it was, I wouldn’t be blogging about it.

So if anyone is actually out there reading this, I realize my words are as weighty as my body right now. In this time of self-reflection, there is a lot for me to say. So I will take pity and wrap this up. Yes, I am ready. No I do not have what I need to start. So today, I will begin the process of determining what action is required to not only be ready, but “to do”. I will attend my dinner party and ENJOY myself, soak myself in good friends and conversation and commit to smaller portions, instead of ravenous eating ……..because………. it……. all…….. just………. taste……… so…….. good. I will slow down, smaller bites, sips of water in between. Maybe even leave a couple bites on my plate?

a salute.

P.S. That is not “a salute” like a soldier, it is Italian, for “to health, wellness”. I am not Italian, but I love bold statements that seem to emphasize what I am trying to say with mere words! Until tomorrow -

day 1

Last night, on the eve of a New Year, my husband and I watched the movie "Julie and Julia". I don't know about you, but I can totally identify with Julie Powell in the movie. I have started many, many things in my life, but don't have much actual accomplishments to brag of. I did finish high school, but did not finish college. I started a book, but it sits unfinished. I have become involved with many "home-based businesses", but have abandoned them all (after spending way too much money to get started up in them). My trailing list of abandoned projects leaves a feeling of failure, then and now.

I am not much of a writer, more of a thinker. I do not have the skills and knowledge to write formally. My spelling is fair, but grammar is shameful. All I really know to qualify myself is a burning sense of wanting to share, of great compassion for those who walk the same path as I.

And what path might that be? The journey to health. Everything I have attempted in life has been to further the health cause. Whether that is towards increased energy, decreased waistline, a feeling of fitness, or just plain overall well-being, I know that I have a passion to share the journey, and hopefully, the results. And my sincere hope is that in sharing the journey, I can inspire and encourage someone else in their walk.

Because I have talked the talk, but now it is time to also "walk the walk".

My mother once asked me why someone who knew so much about health could be overweight. I had never given it much thought until she asked me that, but my response was immediate and was to the point. It is not the knowing that gets us there, it is the doing.

Like the movie Julie and Julia, I have to set some goals, some deadlines and I was intrigued by the idea of blogging and sharing this with someone, anyone out there. It is a strange journey I embark on as I have no idea if this is a solitary event for my own eyes, or if this is a shared opportunity for all of us who share in the war against obesity - namely our own!

My goal is to post daily what actions and events have occurred that are drawing me closer to a life of fitness and health. At the end of 2010, I intend to be 365 days closer to that person I have always envisioned, full of health and happiness.

a salute!